The Social Mechanism Of Lying

July 24, 2018

 

Justification - The social mechanism of lying in the failed attempt to cover up a transgression.

 

One of the easiest ways for me to determine whether you are successful or just average is for me to listen to the words you use. And, one of the easiest ways for you to improve your communication (and ultimately your results) is to stop justifying.

 

If you're late to my workshop, and I ask you why you're late, you'll probably come up with a reason such as "traffic" or "couldn't find a babysitter". You may think you're telling the truth and bad traffic is indeed the reason why you showed up late.

 

However, it's a lie.

 

The lie isn't in the fact that the traffic was bad that particular day or that your usual babysitter was not available. The lie is in the fact that the traffic was the reason you were late.

 

You could have left earlier. Or, if my workshop was in a hotel, you could have stayed in the hotel.

 

Instead of justifying, just say you're late and that you apologize. That's it. Average people care about the justifcation. Successful people just care that you understand that you're made a certain decision and that you'll make a different one in the future.

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