Attending a Free Self-Help Seminar? Read This First

March 21, 2019

 

(Warning: Strong Language)

 

Imagine this: I’m your most favorite Personal Development or Self-Help Guru (PDG), and I trick you into attending one of my “free get-rich-quick seminars”. It’s in a shady hotel basement. The sights and smells vaguely reminds you of your grandma's attic.

 

You listen to me speak for an hour. I go on and on about tips and tricks on how you can earn some passive on the side without having to work for it. Strategies that your coworkers, other family members, and neighbors don’t know about.

 

Here’s the thing though: You don’t know this but you're not actually learning anything.

 

All I’m Doing Is Making You Feel Good

So I Can Sell To You Later.

 

Anyways, you’re sitting there taking notes (on God knows what, I’m not teaching you anything), and then I start telling you a story.

 

About myself.

 

About how sad my childhood was, about how broke I was, and how I almost died or lost my mom to lung cancer.

 

Then I go into the one tiny event that changed my life forever. I bumped into a dude that showed me a simple little trick. After I learnt this trick, my life dramatically improved. I started making passive income. Not a lot mind you, but enough to pay for my mom’s cancer treatment drugs.

 

Then, enough to pay off my car, and my house, and so on.

 

Then, within three years, I became a millionaire.

 

"Come into my life today," I preach.

 

"Here’s a photo of my house now." (I took a photo in front of some rich guy’s house)

 

"Here’s a photo of the house I own in Vietnam." (I stole it off the internet)

 

"Here’s a photo of all the cool expensive cars and other shit I own." (again, internet)

 

Here’s a photo of all the 'vacations' I can afford to go on now. For example:

 

"Here’s me renting one of Sir Richard Branson’s islands for a week." (it’s photoshopped)

 

"Here’s me in Costa Rica on a private resort." (it’s just a cheap timeshare)

 

"Here’s a bunch of photos of me hanging out with famous people" (they have no idea who I am, I just paid $100 each for a selfie).

 

[Why the fuck are you still taking notes? What the hell could you possibly still be ‘learning’?]

 

At this point you’re ABSOLUTELY DYING to know what the ‘trick’ is I mentioned 15 minutes ago. I absolutely know this, and I’m playing off this extreme desire of yours like a sick sadist. I know exactly what I’m doing, and the more I play off this burning desire of yours, the more I’m going to extract from your wallet and life-savings later on when it comes time for me to close.

 

So, what I did here was give you a bunch ‘free’ information (information you could have found for free on the internet), and tell you my life story. The purpose was to

make you think you and I are either in the same situation (except for the one simple little trick), or that you’re life is better than mine, and that once you know that the trick is, you'll be even better off than I am.

 

But what the fuck is that ‘simple little trick’?

 

Yeah, I’m not going to tell you. I’m going to sell it to you.

 

The simple little trick:

  • Normally sells for $50,000, but today, and today only, I’m going to sell it to you for $1,997 (what it only says $997 on the slide? Goddammit, I thought I fixed that. Fine, if you buy it today, I’ll give it to you for $997, but keep in mind I'm losing money on that);

  • I can offer you a 10-week payment plan, but because my accountant needs to catch a plane I can only offer it for the next 30 minutes; and

  • I only brought five with me, and two have already bought while you were watching me speak, so I only have three left…

Sound familiar?

 

You dropped $1,000 because you were caught up in emotions, and the PDG wielded powerful marketing and closing weapons at you. He hacked and slashed your credit cards, and you didn't even notice.

 

So… what the hell did you just buy?

 

A Bunch Of Videos.

 

More of what I said and you heard in that musty old hotel basement.

 

More info you could have found in five minutes of Google searching.

 

And the simple little trick… I reveal it to you in the very last video.

 

Here’s how the very last video goes:

 

I start with even more useless content you could have found yourself on Google

 

I go into another sad story about my childhood.

 

I briefly mention the ‘simple little trick’ that ‘transformed my life’

 

I make up more shit about my life today.

 

Then… I offer you a $250,000 private 1 on 1 mentoring program.

 

I drop the price down to $50,000.

 

I offer a payment plan.

 

I only have time to take on three clients, and one spot already filled as you were watching the video.

 

You see a “BUY NOW” button next to a countdown timer.

 

The truth is, the PDG won’t actually ever tell you what the simple little trick is. They’d rather just keep using the same bullshit to make you keep buying useless shit from them. It’s more profitable for them because you become addicted to their drug. You become addicted to the useless junk you’re learning, and the mystery of that ‘simple little trick’ just continues to string you along.

 

It’s as if they’re a dealer and you’re the drug addict. But, instead of being addicted to cocaine or heroin, you’re addicted to learning the junk the PDG is ‘teaching’ you (learning new stuff causes your brain to secrete addictive chemicals into your bloodstream).

 

So... after you max out every credit card you have, mortgage your house, and buy the 1-on-1 mentoring program, the PDG finally reveals the 'simple little trick'.

 

What to know what it is?

 

Become a PDG

 

Start putting on shit seminars. Start fabricating shit to make it look like you’re wealthier.

 

Start learning their tricks (I’ll reveal them to you in a second).

 

[Did you catch on to that?]

 

Start learning what the basic core human desires are, and exploit them like a shithead.

 

These PDGs, they’re not rich because they do what they teach.

 

They’re Rich Because Suckers Like You And I

Fall For Their Cock-Sucking Tricks.

 

There’s a book I want you to read. It’s called Ca$hvertising. You can buy it through my affiliate link, borrow it from the library, or steal it off the internet. It’s an easy-read, but it goes into much of the tricks that these PDGs (and other advertising companies) use to extract large sums of money out of your wallet and bank account.

 

All while you become addicted to their crap.

 

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